If you ever wonder what motivates us

I remember when I was at college I always saw people doing crosswords, while they’re having breakfast in the dining halls, while they’re bored at econ classes, while they’re waiting for their friends to show up in the coffee shop. I was always amazed and confused: why so many people enjoy and seems like couldn’t stop doing crosswords? So I asked around, and the answer I got was: “I don’t know, but the more you do it the better you get, guess that’s what makes me happy.”

 

This resonates with the idea of “mastery” in the following video. You should watch this if you ever wonder about what motivates us, and I guarantee that you will be more than surprised.

Here we go:

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The Least Worst Decision

Me: When did you get back last night?

L: like 5am…

Me: Are you serious?

L: Yeah, and went to sleep at 6am, and got into office at 10am.

Me: ……

Me: How did the presentation go?

L: It went very well.

 

I was in a client meeting the entire day, it can get tiring. We have this department called Risk and Quantitative Analysis which is an independent risk management team who works closely with portfolio management to make sure the risk a certain portfolio’s taking is in line with its guideline and comparable to other portfolios across firm with similar constraints. 

When was your defining moment?

BLK President Rob Kapito addressed the Wharton School Class of 2010 at the MBA graduation ceremony on May 16. It was not as funny as Ellen’s, or Blair’s, and I couldn’t stop but thinking: MBA commencement’s so boring…but the major takeaway I had from this speech was when he talked about the “defining moment”.

Ellen’s defining moment was probably when she realized her girlfriend passed away in the car accident and she was living in a basement back then, which made her wonder “why this is happening to me and what does this mean”, and inspired her to create the script on the telephone call with the God. Rob’s defining moment was when his father got seriously sick and he realized he didn’t want his family to go through the same hardship.

Why Don’t YOU Just Do it?

In our Women’s Initiative launch event, our COO mentioned while she was in Boston last week, one of the women in the audience came up to her after the speech and suggested: I’ve noticed we typically have a lot of male speakers in our analyst training classes in the past. As we have quite a few female analysts joining this summer, it might make sense to invite more female speakers to present themselves at the training.

The COO said: it was a great idea. I will definitely communicate this to the representatives in HR who put together the incoming class training. But wait a minute. Why should I be the person doing this? This is YOUR idea so why don’t YOU just do it yourself? Why don’t you get in touch with the people responsible for this directly? Why don’t you provide some ideas and/or topics our female leaders could cover, and you could even be a speaker yourself!

Why Did You Leave Your Previous Job?

So today I am trying to help you answer this frequently asked question during interviews: Why did you leave your previous job?

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Be prepared, you will be asked

It is almost funny how many people (even senior executives) will freak out by this question. One thing you should keep in mind, though, is that you are lucky to be in transition nowadays. Given what has happened with the economy in the past 2 years, it is NORMAL to have to quit your previous position, willingly or unwillingly. It is also NORMAL when an interviewer asks this question because he/she wants to understand your background and previous circumstances better, NOT to sabotage your interview, so please do not freak out.

Make sure you practice your answers as much as you can, in front of the mirror, with your peers, on the telephone, while you’re showering…until you are perfectly comfortable and not defensive at all when addressing this issue.

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Answers to Avoid

[500 Days of Summer] & All Other Movies

Joseph Gordon-Levitt, 500 Days of Summer 

Justin Long, He’s just not that into you

Rodrigo Santoro, Love Actually

I love these three movies. The obvious reason is: these guys are so cute. Honestly I thought they are all half Asian. But turns out Joe was born in LA and raised as a Jew; Justin was born in Connecticut and raised as a Roman Catholic; and Rodrigo is a Brazilian.

This demonstrates how wrong I can be about people a lot of times. Or again, people see what they want to see: you notice one thing, and you completely ignore everything else. I see them as half Asian because I like them, I want to relate to them, and because I know nothing else about them, I could probably only assume that they are half Asian, which makes me more comfortable liking them.

Believe it or not, people try hard to understand each other. But a lot of times, no matter how hard you try to understand a person, you end up finding a complete stranger. As weird as you are, you couldn’t figure out the other person’s weirdness. There are too many question marks haunting your little mind, so then you freak out, then you want to escape.

The Ultimate Secret on Time Management

The ultimate secret on time management: Say no, unless it’s an absolute yes.

How Much is Too Much – What Not to Overdo in an Interview

Three things could happen during the course of your job search.

1) You get into almost all first-round interviews (you must have a very strong resume) but you don’t land anything for real. 2) You don’t break through to many first-round interviews but you got almost all the offers from those firms you interviewed with(You must be great at interviews). 3) You hardly get interviews and you don’t get offers (er…I’ll leave you alone for now).

Let’s focus on the first scenario. So you have a strong resume, and they would like to know you more. You feel you did a pretty good job at your interview, but what could possible go wrong? 

Don’t Overshare

You can’t imagine how many people don’t know how to answer “tell me about yourself”. This is NOT a question to invite you to elaborate on your life-time stories, how many guys you dated, how your parents divorced when you were nine, or even how you did part-time jobs for all college years to finance your own education (save that for later). It is simply a question of “what are your major skills/qualities that will contribute to this job?” 

When You Lose Everything

I discovered Ellen DeGeneres’s commencement speech at Tulane a while back. I watched Ellen’s talk show 4-5pm almost every day my senior year. She used to make my afternoons filled with laughter and joy, and some contemplation about life. Now I have a full-time job so I have to skip and it’s hard to catch up with all the DVR recordings on the weekends, but this clip reminds me how sharp and hilarious, yet inspiring she is.

When People Ask for Your Help: The Less, The More.

A good friend was complaining to me. He is a very sharing person and he has good contacts in his industry. He helped many people for the past few years, even total strangers on many things, but when he was switching job himself and asked those he has helped for help, a lot of them don’t even bother to share the information they obviously know.

Why? You made it too easy for them when they were asking for your help. You failed to let them see how much value you added, and when they get what they want, they think they would have achieved it without your help anyway, so they don’t appreciate you as much as they should have. 

You don’t want that. You go out of your way to help people and you deserve the respect and appreciation. You want them to see your value, and to value your time.  And here’s how to do that: 

Maybe You Need a Tree Hole Too

They say in ancient times, people go into the mountains and the forests to find a tree hole, and tell the tree hole their secrets, then they seal the hole with some mud, and the secrets would stay there forever. 

I guess everyone needs a tree hole. People have too much pressure nowadays. Under pressure, either we run, or we endure. For some people, run is not even an option. So they endure, and endure, and endure, until one day they explode. Yet they don’t talk. They are so afraid that everyone else is everything but themselves. They are the same; they are so different; they feel lonely, and so do you.