How Honest Can You Be?

I watched the Confession of a Go Go Girl last night. It is a story about this girl who started go-go dancing in order to make ends meet, but most lost herself in the “easy money” job and jeopardized her relationship with her family, boyfriend, her acting career, and most importantly, her true self. She managed to get back to her acting classes toward the end of the movie and I want to share this simple but astonishing monologue she did on stage: 

I lied to everyone about everything, expect me.
I say I’m not tired when I am, I say I’m hungry when I’m not, I tell people what they want to hear and never say what I am actually feeling.
I let the lies pile up, like bricks on a wall until I can’t see out and no one else can see in.
I make a plan to escape, I become someone else; Put on a disguise and I climb over the wall and no one recognizes me.
I feel powerful. I can get people to do what I want them to do.
But I go to far. I get lost and I don’t recognize myself.
Take off the disguise, I give away the power.
I give up the control, I retrace my steps, go back to the wall and I take it down brick by brick, I bury them to mark the place.
I strip away all the lies, until there are none left.
I remember the girl I left behind. I claim the confidence i was missing.
I envision the women I want to be, tell everyone the truth about everything, especially you.

 

I have been reading Penelope Trunk’s blog for a while and I have recommended her articles to many of my friends. She is insanely honest and extremely sharing with her insightful and practical advices on networking, job hunting, career and life in general.

Things I wish I knew when I was at College

For years I have been trying so hard to understand what I want from life, and what I could do to make the best out of it. Four years of college life (not limited to “college” life, obviously) in a different country have constantly challenged my boundaries and characters, and in retrospect, I feel grateful for all the good and bad that happened to me. Here are a few points that I want to share with all of you.

.

.

1. Be your own healer.

I used to believe that love is the cure for every pain. But I was wrong, because there are so many types of loves that we constantly confuse ourselves and draw each other into unnecessary troubles and conflicts. I have always been a “strong” girl, like many other girls, I am used to “pretend to be cool” and “always smile, be active” on the outside. But I realized long ago that I was not so strong from inside, I was actually weak, sentimental and even vulnerable. So I used to expect that one day there will be a guy coming into my life as a savior, a healer. It turned out pretty much to be an illusion.

Why? even you met someone really responsible, he is never really going to be responsible for you. Ultimately he does not owe you (or anyone) anything. If you devote for a relationship it only means you really care, but it doesn’t mean he will take responsibility for your choices, your mistakes and your sorrow. If you want a better life, please be your own healer, and make your heart, not appearance, stronger.

2. Face your fear.