Ask Danye
*New Feature*
If there is a specific question you have in mind or a specific topic you would like me to wirte about, please kindly comment below or fill out the contact form. I would love to see what you are interested in and will try my best to address your concerns in my posts to follow.
Cheers, and thank you again for stopping by.
Leave a comment
An Advice A Day - What Danye Says 
could you write about something about your life in yale or new york now?
Hi Jessica,
Yes I think I write about my life in NY quite frequently as most of my recent posts are based on my life here and my understandings of the people around me. I just posted two articles on life at Yale and you are welcome to check them out at:
https://anadviceaday.wordpress.com/2010/08/31/things-i-wish-i-knew-when-i-was-at-college/
https://anadviceaday.wordpress.com/2010/08/31/what-happened-to-the-moonlight/
I am very interested in the management consulting field. How were you able to emerge into this field. I have been trying for nearly 3 months at several management consulting firms, had interviews with Gallup and Corporate Executive Board; however, nothing has converted into a career opportunity. How would you recommend I proceed? Where should I look for opportunities in this field? Are there headhunters for recent college graduates?
Carl I saw your invite on LinkedIn as well. I am not really in the consulting industry though I would say my current job in account management/client relations in the investment management industry requires similar skill set. I would recommend reaching out to individuals you know (maybe your alumni network etc) who are already in consulting to share more of their experiences.
Headhunters generally aim for experienced hires so your profile will look much more attractive if you have done similar job elsewhere (if not, see if you have worked for related unpaid positions, volunteer work/activities).
Tom Spencer writes a great consulting blog that you might want to check out too: http://www.tomspencer.com.au/
also do check out http://managementconsulted.com/
Thanks for your reply. sometimes I want to be a girl such as you( although it is important to be the one as yourself ) . You see you are Ivy League grad, confident, pretty, smart. especially you are so stong inside. I think maybe you experiences something unhappy in the relationship, such as me now. But you are going ahead. I really doubt whether I will be loved by someone, the most important is I can’t accept myself. My face is not pretty for the pimples，and I am not open to the guys who I like, and so on. So how can I be the one like U ?
Let’s get something straight here. Relationship can be hard for anyone, regardless how well-educated, how pretty or how smart you are. Many people can be very highly achieved academically but they will totally screw their relationships. Also going to an Ivy school means something for sure but it doesn’t mean everything, and not everyone who went to an Ivy school has what it takes to live happily and healthily. And about being pretty or not, if you think having pimples bothers you, try to find some acne solutions to solve the problem. But again we see this all the time many girls who are not that pretty-looking may have a very enriching and happy relationship. Finally about confidence, I suggest you read the following article. Confidence is a learnable skill and I personally know many people who learned to be confident by faking it first. So if I were you I wouldn’t worry too much about all the above you have mentioned, I would try to develop something special about myself, and live with it. Life may be unfair, but it doesn’t mean there is no opportunities for you. In fact I believe there are many of them out there, you just need to seriously open your eyes. Does that make sense? http://www.bnet.com/blog/entry-level/psychologists-confidence-is-a-learnable-skill/3471?promo=664&tag=nl.e664
Hi Danye,
I have a question here for you.
You said you are big on efficiency and I’m a slow worker.
I try to make myself work more efficiently, but I’m afraid that if I work faster, I’ll make some stupid mistakes. Or I just don’t know how to make my brain run faster…
Do you have some suggestions for me?
Thanks.
Hi Maggie, good question. I probably need more information to analyze your specific situation and to help you to come up with something most applicable. But just on top of my head I have a few thoughts for you to consider:
1) Are you slow in the beginning or you have been slow no matter how much time you have spent practicing and improving your techniques? Most of the time it’s normal to be slow in the beginning but there should be a learning curve there, so don’t get frustrated.
2) Some people are simply impatient and want to get everything done as soon as possible, and I am one of those people. But many people enjoy taking more time to make sure everything ties up and there’s absolutely no mistakes, if your job is especially detail-oriented to some extend it’s okay to be slow, you want to be right than sorry.
3) The most important question I have to ask you is, do you have a lot of tight deadlines? Are you inefficient because you are not, or you don’t have to? there’s a huge difference between the two. If your job doesn’t involve tight deadlines then there’s nothing wrong with taking your time. Having said that, if you want to consciously improve your efficiency you have to set your OWN deadlines, that’s the only way your brain and your body are gonna respond to the speed and start working in a more timely manner.
4) Finally about mistakes, there are mistakes that are huge and you need to try your best to avoid. there are mistakes that are okay and are expected from time to time, and there are mistakes that nobody will even notice. Focus only on the most important mistakes and forget about the rest. If you don’t prioritize and want everything to be absolutely perfect, there’s no way you can be fast.
Hope this helps, and good luck!
Thanks for the reply.
I think I’m the kind of person who likes to slow down and make sure everything is perfect. However, I do have a lot of deadlines. What I usually do is staying up late to finish my work and make sure everything is perfect.
I have tried to set my own deadlines before, but I give up on it. I guess I’m just so easy to be distracted and cannot focus on one thing for a long time…
Hi Danye,
I have a question here for you.
I know you are a competent woman, I did not suppose you can send the message to me as soon as possible. I appreciate it. You were a student in business school of Yale, weren’t you? My major in MSU may be finance, Could you give me some suggestion about how to be a preeminent student ? Thank you very much.
Hi Jack,
I went to Yale undergrad not business school. I am not an expert on how to be the best student at school. Because I was not, and I never wanted to compete with other people in that way. I think college is an important phase in your life because that’s the period which will define who you are as a person, how you approach life, and how you interact with people, and how much you know about yourself, not necessarily or at least not just about how much you can achieve academically.
I know you are eager to prepare for college. But college is all about experiencing new things, challenge yourself, and get to know yourself better. You will walk into unexpected situations, and that will test your true character. You cannot always win, so I would suggest instead of winning, or becoming the most preeminent student, please focus on what kind of person you are becoming, and what kind of life you will be leading. Don’t get too ahead of yourself. Just keep learning and keep living your life.
Take initiatives, ask good questions, and respect other people, and know who you are.
That’s really all I have for now. Hope it helps.
Take it easy and good luck.
Hi Danye,
I am currently a sophomore and I have yet to decide on a career. I have thought about this endlessly but am still stuck between medicine or finance. Most people simply assume im in it for the money but don’t get me wrong, I am stuck between the two because ever since high school I have loved studying the sciences. Reading about how our bodies work, how complex humans are, and even solving mechanistic questions for organic chemistry makes me happy. I really enjoying learning about humans, physically and behaviorally.
However, i dont feel being a doctor or scientist is suitable for me as a career because both careers are too passive (correct me if i am wrong). After attending many finance workshops in college, I realized my personality fits finance better. I simply cannot imagine myself in a laboratory for hours. It just doesn’t make me as excited or motivated as let’s say, speaking to clients or trying to figure out where the market is headed. What do you think would be the best to do in college? Should I major in science, take pre-med courses, and be involved in finance activities (while both risking my GPA and taking classes that have no relevance to my career) or should I just do well with one career and stick with it to the end?
On the other hand, I hear that finance is much more risky in terms of employment and women who aren’t ‘the best’ are the first ones to go. After having read Suits by Nina Godiwalla and currently reading Liars Poker, I was wondering, is the culture in finance extremely fratty? As a female in finance, do you get tired of traveling and having to deal with corporate culture sometimes? Do you feel your job would take too much time out of family life (maybe not now, but in the future)?
Thanks 🙂
You are asking very good questions and it’s impressive you are thinking ahead of many other people still being a sophomore (it’s also almost scary too, lol). But to answer your question, I believe you are on the right track thinking about “what activities you enjoy doing” vs “what you may be good at”. However I just want to point out that it is perfectly okay for you to have an interest in finance and may pursue a career in that field while majoring in science or pre-med. I know pre-med is very demanding and you may have to wear a lot of hats at school so you do need to decide for yourself if that is too overwhelming, but the reality is: finance firms don’t always only hire finance/econ majors. Actually they love someone from a diverse background who may be able to look at things from a different perspective, and medicine/healthcare is a HOT TOPIC. If you are good at what you do, there is no reason why you cannot get into a finance firm with a pre-med degree. if anything, you may have an even better edge coming from a specific sector. You may also want to consider: consulting jobs that focus on health care as a sector. There are many firms specialize in that as a matter of fact.
Liars Poker is a good book. It makes me laugh, and makes me think. It surprises me too: how come things didn’t really change for 20 some years!!! But firms have different cultures. Not all financial firms are like what’s described in the book and many firms do have decent percentage of female employees and may even have specific women initiatives or other diversity programs. I wouldn’t worry about that for now though, because I would want to “get my feet in the door” first and see if I can actually do a good job and then go from there.
Good luck!
** have you ever worried about unemployment?
I do, just like everyone else. That’s why you work hard, you learn as much as you can, and you respect the people you work with, and try to think from your boss’ perspective.
Thanks for Danye’s share, very helpful!
I’m just interested in reading your blogs and I know you are in BLK. I studied economics in university of western Ontario and have some experience in mining/ finance. There is a world mining fund in blackrock I’m interested to know more about too. I just got in New York City and I’m sorry that the weather is so bad today. I feel you may be wonderfully busy before and in holidays. I do hope to get some advice from you, but happy thanksgiving.
I was in a “Long Distance Relationship” and my boyfriend and I broke up about a year ago. I just found out that she already likes another girl but my friends kept telling me that there’s still a big chance that we are getting back together when he comes home. I felt like I have already moved on but when I see his posts about this new girl he likes, my heart sanks. What do I do? Have I really moved on? Or is this just part of tha curiousity of an ex girlfriend of her replacement. Thanks!
Have a casual catch up with him next time you see him. Ask him how’s it going. If he brings up his gf, great. Maybe that will settle things. If not, and he’s clearly still attracted to you, then maybe say something like, so xxx mentioned the other day we should get back together because you’ve been talking about me a lot…I am not sure if my friend was kidding or not…and see how he reacts. If he’s like no way, happy with my current gf, then say yeah happy for you. If he’s more like debating or something, just hear him out and go from there.